Part one of a very very very long post!!!
Thursday, 23 April 2009
Ahhh!!! I'm back WOO!!!! Was in a emo state for a long time.. didn't show to other people by trying to act happy and being really crap in making jokes. Tried my best to be funny and cold jokes came flooding in like bombs in WW2. Finally got back to myself only to turned freaking lazy.
Stay at home sleep like a died pig without even moving.. out of the whole 24 hours, 18 hours was for sleep and 6 was used to either entertaining people whom i treasure as a friend/family etc. etc. or in a form of getting up to eat my one meal per day for that period of time and checking news.
Finally a sub course for poly started without me being prepared.. Was in a state of self deny, held evil thoughts and was bloody lazy as well.. wasn't ready to meet new people in a state which i think is my personal worst.
Thoughout that sub course which was physics, i was emoing away.. Totally not ready to meet new people lah.. letting them see a negative side of me was something i'm not prepared to do.. the effect will just be like year one ITE ><.. damn those days where my mind just floats into the sky and evil thoughts just flows in ><..
sub course ended with me running away after two days with two remaining. Didn't speak a word to anybody in that two days and just purely acted either lifeless or emotionless.. whichever deemed best. Maybe it's the long holiday of 5 months which is acting up on me, but being a rather active person going out almost everyday with different friends, lack of interaction isn't a reason i can use...
Luckily during the same weekend god saved my soul.. I got a invitation from a friend i bonded very well in a BBQ event to a church event at Easter Sunday.
In that Sunday which happens to be the earliest i woke up in like... 6 months? I dragged my body and mind unwillingly towards Puggol where to church is at. Reaching there only to find out that all the people i knew was performing that day and wasn't free to meet and bring me around the church. Walked around the church like a lost devil, getting angrier by the second as time goes by, then a member of the church noticed me and warming welcomed me into the church and at the same time brought me to where to seats are available(all seats at the lower level are taken, only the upper level ones are available which only members of the church knows).
The event which lasted 3 hours moved me, the atmosphere of that church was unbelievable and the things they said was really moving. People from Vietnam who had to hid every sunday when the hold the church because of their government sharing their personal stories makes me feel how free our country is and yet we still ask for more. Meeting up my friend Ting Yu who was the one who invited me after the service and meet up some more people in that church. Talking to them improved my mood greatly and mainly thanks to that, I was more then ready to go to my orientation on the following week tues and wed.
~(06:37)
